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Hi there, Rob here…
There is a very specific kind of message that instantly raises your heart rate. It starts with, “Sorry to bother you…” and somehow manages to do the exact opposite of what it promises.
Because nobody sends that message unless they are about to bother you. Not a little. A lot. It is never followed by good news. It is followed by context you do not have, a problem you were not expecting, and a sense that whatever you were doing two seconds ago is no longer important.
The funny part is that most people write it because they are trying to be polite. They know they are interrupting. They want to soften the blow. But in reality, it just delays the actual question and adds a layer of anxiety while you wait for the rest of the message to arrive.
A better approach is surprisingly simple. Lead with the point. Share the context. Say what you need. “We have an issue with X.” “Can you take a look at Y today?” “This is blocked until we decide Z.” Clear messages respect time far more than apologetic ones.
So next time you catch yourself typing “sorry to bother you,” stop and rewrite it. You are allowed to ask for help. Just make it clear, complete, and honest. Everyone will get to the answer faster, and nobody has to sit staring at a typing indicator wondering what is coming next.
👉 Polite is good. Clear is better.
Rob & Jason
Dev Partners
PS. We are Dev Partners, helping teams communicate clearly without unnecessary stress.
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